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๐“˜๐“ฝ ๐“ฆ๐“ช๐“ผ๐“ท'๐“ฝ ๐“œ๐“ฎ

๐น๐‘œ๐“‡ ๐’ฏ๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐’ฑ๐‘œ๐’ธ๐’ถ๐“ "๐’ฎ๐‘œ๐“‡๐“‡๐“Ž ๐’œ๐’ท๐‘œ๐“Š๐“‰ ๐’ฏ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰" ๐’ž๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“๐“๐‘’๐“ƒ๐‘”๐‘’

By Mike Singleton ๐Ÿ’œ Mikeydred Published about 10 hours ago โ€ข 3 min read
A Nightcafe Creation By The AUthor

A Letter Sent

๐’Ÿ๐‘’๐’ถ๐“‡ ๐’ด๐‘œ๐“Š

๐ผ ๐“‡๐‘’๐’ถ๐“๐“๐“Ž ๐’น๐‘œ ๐’ถ๐“…๐‘œ๐“๐‘œ๐‘”๐’พ๐“ˆ๐‘’ ๐’ป๐‘œ๐“‡ ๐“Œ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“…๐“…๐‘’๐“ƒ๐‘’๐’น ๐’ถ๐’ป๐“‰๐‘’๐“‡ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“‚๐‘’๐’ถ๐“ ๐ผ ๐“ˆ๐‘’๐“‡๐“‹๐‘’๐’น ๐“๐’ถ๐“ˆ๐“‰ ๐“ƒ๐’พ๐‘”๐’ฝ๐“‰, ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“ˆ๐“Š๐’ท๐“ˆ๐‘’๐“†๐“Š๐‘’๐“ƒ๐“‰ ๐‘’๐’ป๐’ป๐‘’๐’ธ๐“‰๐“ˆ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐“‡๐‘’๐“ˆ๐“Š๐“๐“‰๐‘’๐’น ๐’พ๐“ƒ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‹๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐“ˆ๐“…๐‘’๐“ƒ๐’น ๐“‰๐“Œ๐‘œ ๐’น๐’ถ๐“Ž๐“ˆ ๐‘œ๐“ƒ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“‰๐‘œ๐’พ๐“๐‘’๐“‰ ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น ๐’ท๐’พ๐“ƒ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š๐“‡ ๐’ธ๐“๐‘œ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“ˆ ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น ๐“Š๐“ƒ๐’น๐‘’๐“‡๐“Œ๐‘’๐’ถ๐“‡, ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐“ˆ๐“‚๐‘’๐“๐“, ๐’ท๐“Š๐“‰ ๐’พ๐“‰ ๐“Œ๐’ถ๐“ˆ๐“ƒ'๐“‰ ๐“‡๐‘’๐’ถ๐“๐“๐“Ž ๐“‚๐“Ž ๐’ป๐’ถ๐“Š๐“๐“‰, ๐ผ ๐’ธ๐’ถ๐“ƒ ๐’ถ๐“ˆ๐“ˆ๐“Š๐“‡๐‘’ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š.

๐ผ ๐“ˆ๐“…๐‘’๐“ƒ๐“‰ ๐’ถ ๐“๐‘œ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“‰๐’พ๐“‚๐‘’ ๐“…๐“‡๐‘’๐“…๐’ถ๐“‡๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“‚๐‘’๐’ถ๐“. ๐ผ ๐“‚๐’ถ๐’น๐‘’ ๐“ˆ๐“Š๐“‡๐‘’ ๐’ถ๐“๐“ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“Š๐“‰๐‘’๐“ƒ๐“ˆ๐’พ๐“๐“ˆ ๐“Œ๐‘’๐“‡๐‘’ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘œ๐“‡๐‘œ๐“Š๐‘”๐’ฝ๐“๐“Ž ๐’ธ๐“๐‘’๐’ถ๐“ƒ, ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’น ๐’ถ๐“๐“ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘”๐“‡๐‘’๐’น๐’พ๐‘’๐“ƒ๐“‰๐“ˆ ๐’ธ๐’ถ๐“‚๐‘’ ๐’ป๐“‡๐‘œ๐“‚ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐ป๐’ถ๐“‡๐“‡๐‘œ๐’น๐“ˆ ๐’ป๐‘œ๐‘œ๐’น ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“๐“, ๐“ˆ๐‘œ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“Ž ๐“Œ๐‘’๐“‡๐‘’ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐’ถ๐’ท๐“ˆ๐‘œ๐“๐“Š๐“‰๐‘’ ๐’ท๐‘’๐“ˆ๐“‰ ๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“ƒ๐‘’ ๐’ธ๐‘œ๐“Š๐“๐’น ๐‘”๐‘’๐“‰.

๐ผ ๐“‚๐“Š๐“ˆ๐“‰ ๐“ˆ๐’ถ๐“Ž ๐ผ ๐“๐’ถ๐“Š๐‘”๐’ฝ๐‘’๐’น ๐“Œ๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐ผ ๐’ฝ๐‘’๐’ถ๐“‡๐’น ๐“Œ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐’น ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“…๐“…๐‘’๐“ƒ๐‘’๐’น ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š. ๐ผ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘œ๐“Š๐‘”๐’ฝ๐“‰ ๐’พ๐“‰ ๐“Œ๐’ถ๐“ˆ ๐’ฝ๐’พ๐“๐’ถ๐“‡๐’พ๐‘œ๐“Š๐“ˆ. ๐’ฏ๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐ผ ๐“‡๐‘’๐’ถ๐“๐’พ๐“ˆ๐‘’๐’น ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“€๐“ƒ๐’พ๐“‹๐‘’๐“ˆ ๐ผ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐’น ๐“Š๐“ˆ๐‘’๐’น ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐’น ๐“ƒ๐‘œ๐“‰ ๐’ท๐‘’๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐’ธ๐“๐‘’๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐‘’๐’น ๐“…๐“‡๐‘œ๐“…๐‘’๐“‡๐“๐“Ž ๐“ˆ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐’ธ๐‘’ ๐’ธ๐“Š๐“‰๐“‰๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“Š๐“… ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘œ๐“ˆ๐‘’ ๐“‡๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’ธ๐’พ๐’น ๐“ˆ๐“‰๐‘’๐’ถ๐“€๐“ˆ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐’น ๐’ท๐‘’๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐“๐‘’๐’ป๐“‰ ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐“‡๐‘œ๐“‰ ๐’พ๐“ƒ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐‘”๐’ถ๐“‡๐’ถ๐‘”๐‘’. ๐’œ ๐’ท๐“๐‘’๐’ถ๐’ธ๐’ฝ ๐’ท๐’ถ๐“‰๐’ฝ ๐“Œ๐’ถ๐“ˆ๐“ƒ'๐“‰ ๐“‡๐‘’๐’ถ๐“๐“๐“Ž ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐’ท๐‘’๐“ˆ๐“‰ ๐“Œ๐’ถ๐“Ž ๐‘œ๐’ป ๐’ธ๐“๐‘’๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“‚.

๐’ฏ๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐ผ ๐“ƒ๐‘œ๐“‰๐’พ๐’ธ๐‘’๐’น ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐’ท๐‘œ๐“ ๐‘œ๐’ป ๐“๐’ถ๐“๐’ถ๐“‰๐’พ๐“‹๐‘’๐“ˆ ๐“ƒ๐‘’๐“๐“‰ ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“…๐’ถ๐“ƒ๐“ˆ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐’น ๐“ˆ๐‘œ๐“‚๐‘’๐’ฝ๐‘œ๐“Œ ๐’ท๐‘’๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐‘’๐“‚๐“…๐“‰๐’พ๐‘’๐’น. ๐’Ÿ๐’พ๐’น ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’๐“Ž ๐‘’๐“ƒ๐’น ๐“Š๐“… ๐’พ๐“ƒ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“ˆ๐“‰๐‘’๐“Œ? ๐ผ ๐’ถ๐“‚ ๐“ƒ๐‘œ๐“‰ ๐“ˆ๐“Š๐“‡๐‘’, ๐’ท๐“Š๐“‰ ๐“‚๐’ถ๐“Ž๐’ท๐‘’ ๐“Œ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‰ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“…๐“…๐‘’๐“ƒ๐‘’๐’น ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐“Ž๐‘œ๐“Š ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐’น ๐“ˆ๐‘œ๐“‚๐‘’๐“‰๐’ฝ๐’พ๐“ƒ๐‘” ๐“‰๐‘œ ๐’น๐‘œ ๐“Œ๐’พ๐“‰๐’ฝ ๐’พ๐“‰. ๐ต๐“Š๐“‰ ๐’พ๐“‰ ๐“Œ๐’ถ๐“ˆ๐“ƒ'๐“‰ ๐“‚๐“Ž ๐’ป๐’ถ๐“Š๐“๐“‰, ๐’พ๐“‰ ๐“Œ๐’ถ๐“ˆ๐“ƒ'๐“‰ ๐“‚๐‘’. ๐’ฒ๐‘’๐“๐“, ๐“‚๐’ถ๐“Ž๐’ท๐‘’ ๐ผ ๐“ˆ๐’ฝ๐‘œ๐“Š๐“๐’น ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‹๐‘’ ๐“‰๐’ถ๐“€๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐’ถ ๐“๐’พ๐“‰๐“‰๐“๐‘’ ๐“‚๐‘œ๐“‡๐‘’ ๐’ธ๐’ถ๐“‡๐‘’, ๐’ท๐“Š๐“‰ ๐’พ๐’ป ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘œ๐“ˆ๐‘’ ๐“๐’ถ๐“๐’ถ๐“‰๐’พ๐“‹๐‘’๐“ˆ ๐‘’๐“ƒ๐’น๐‘’๐’น ๐“Š๐“… ๐’พ๐“ƒ ๐“‰๐’ฝ๐‘’ ๐“‚๐‘’๐’ถ๐“, ๐’พ๐“‰ ๐“‚๐“Š๐“ˆ๐“‰ ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐“‹๐‘’ ๐’ท๐‘’๐‘’๐“ƒ ๐“ˆ๐‘œ๐“‚๐‘’๐‘œ๐“ƒ๐‘’ ๐‘’๐“๐“ˆ๐‘’.

๐’ด๐‘œ๐“Š๐“‡๐“ˆ ๐’œ๐“…๐‘œ๐“๐‘œ๐‘”๐‘’๐“‰๐’พ๐’ธ๐’ถ๐“๐“๐“Ž

๐‘€๐’พ๐’ธ๐’ฝ๐’ถ๐‘’๐“ ๐’ณ

A Phone Call

Then the phone rang

It was them, and they were not happy at all.

Michael X: "Hello"

Them: "What the fuck, do you know what you have done? You spiteful, incompetent, careless, fucking moron. You have had me in bed, in hospital, on the fucking toilet, clearing up my excrement and pee, ruining my clothes, and losing me time from work. They said it was MY fault, I should be more careful what I eat and who I trust"

Michael X: "It wasn't my fault, and I am really sorry. I don't know how it happened, but it won't happen again, I promise. Can I offer you another meal as recompense? I can make it up to you, and this time I will be more careful, I promise"

Them: "Seriously? Are you joking? You damned near poisoned me, and have cost me a fortune in time and clothes and cleaning up, and you expect me to trust you to prepare another meal for me. The best you could do is to get me a voucher for a meal at The Hilton or The Ritz. You are dangerous in a kitchen"

Michael X: "Come on, give me another chance. This is the only time this has ever happened, and it won't happen again."

Them: "It's the only time it has happened because you have never cooked for anyone else, unless you count giving your dog and cat pet food each morning. Are they still alive?"

Michael X: "Don't be silly. They are fine, and they love what I give them. I know I messed up, and that resulted in you getting very messed up, but I have apologised. The knives and pans are now cleaned, disinfected and stored in their drawers and on their shelves. The laxatives have been moved to the medical cupboard, so there is no chance of them dropping into any food I am making. I promise, this will never happen again."

Them: "I don't believe you, and I don't trust you. You didn't so much as cross a line as you didn't even know the line existed. I am sorry, we are done now, don't ever contact me again."

Then, the phone went dead.

Silence reigned.

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Comments (3)

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  • ROCK aka Andrea Polla (Simmons)about 6 hours ago

    Oh this was so hilarious! Really a good one MikeyD!

  • Paul Aaron Domenickabout 9 hours ago

    Haha. Very amusing and funny.

  • Dharrsheena Raja Segarranabout 10 hours ago

    That letter was very difficult for me to read, because of that font. I think I'm getting old ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… I copied and pasted it to my Notes app to see if the font would change, but it didn't. Same happened in Google Docs. So I gave up, lol. But I did get the gist of the story from the phone conversation and it was hilarious! ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ Who the hell has laxatives laying around like that?!

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