feminism
At its core, feminism is the simple conviction that women are equal to men in every regard, and should be treated as such.
From Victim to Thriver
Too me, the #MeToo movement has to be the most gratifying thing I have ever seen. You see, the first time I was sexually assaulted I was in ninth grade. The guy I was dating, was slowly working up my trust in him. He came to church with my family, Sunday dinners, and I was at his home often. Finally came time for the Valentine's Dance. We had lots of fun, laughed with friends, and went to his house to hang out for a couple hours before my curfew was up. The next thing I know, I am in the bathroom vomiting. I clean myself up, and his aunt takes me home. The first few days, everything was hazy. I could not remember anything that happened after the dance. I knew I should, I did not drink or do any recreational drugs - my dad was a strict Baptist Gideon and would find out easily in a smaller town. When I was not grounded within a week, I knew I had not done anything against his rules. So it is up to the next weekend, and I am out shopping with my step-mom. We are looking at items for a spring picnic. She shows me several different colored checked picnic tables, and I bust out crying. I did not know why, and my step-mom looked at my like I has lost my mind. It felt like it honestly. I had just turned 15, what was wrong with me? The previous week I was perfectly happy, and now this!? I knew something was not right at all. I went to my best friend, and told her about my memory loss from that night. She decided to help me figure out what I lost. A few days later, she told me she had overheard some guys talking about my boyfriend. When she confronted them, our worst nightmares came true. My boyfriend and his cousin had raped me in the cousin's bedroom. The walls? Black and white checker board print. Just like those tablecloths in the store that had made me cry. To this day, I can not be sure if I was drugged, or my mind just blocked everything out to save my mind from cracking. I choose to believe the latter. This was not my only experience with being abused, beaten, or raped. Just my first. I was far too trusting in my younger years. I was later on married to my first husband, who very quickly became violent. He yelled, screamed, and threatened me. Pretty soon, my nightmares in the past became reality once more. The man I married would do things too me in my sleep. That was a nine-year hell. I finally got out, only to discover the new guy in my life would be slamming me down on beds and couches in our home. This way, I never bruised. This man was my second husband, and he actually sent me to counseling saying there is no way a doctor would agree with my claims of him being "mean" to me. He also wanted proof I was not lying about my past abuses. I was in therapy for nearly two years. It was at that point that I learned the different stages of recovery in my therapist's eyes. He told me there are three in his eyes. Victim, survivor, and thriver. The victim stage is the longest. It is when you think of your abuse and abusers every day several times a day. Nightmares are a nightly occurrence. Then you have survivor. It is everything else. The reality of what you have been through, less nightmares, and less trusting of others. But the final stage my therapist demands....thriver! It is when the nightmares stop, the trust returns, and you are not hard on yourself at all. You have stopped blaming yourself for something that was never your fault to begin with. This is my life now. The life of a thriver! I went to college and got my degree. I found a real man who has never laid a hand on me or threatened me in any way. I have a home, grown boys, and two grand-babies at the age of 41. My life has changed so much, and I am proud to be part of the #MeToo movement! It is about time women had a real voice, and stood up too say "This is my life and my body!! You have no right to touch me without MY permission!!" (Tiffany Allen)
By Tiffany Allen8 years ago in Viva
Glamorous Assistants
The last month’s been pretty good for feminism. The #MeToo campaign generated a lot of much-needed attention for issues that affect many women, yet have been dismissed for decades. First it was sexual harassment and assault, but now we’re talking about more nuanced feminist issues, and people seem to actually be listening. Hurrah, no more yelling into the void!
By Katy Preen8 years ago in Viva
Secret
I am 23 and counting. There is nothing unusual about me, I live in an apartment, I go to college online, I have a boyfriend, I work full-time. I have a caring family and kind friends. However normal my life may appear, we all know that looks can be deceiving. As much as I trust in my family and friends, there is a secret I keep from them. I am a victim of rape.
By Tati Elizabeth8 years ago in Viva
Feminist Documentaries All Women Should See
Feminists are truly the most passionate and courageous individuals who believe in equality and demolishing stereotypes in the world. They fight for all opportunities be given to women including equal income pay and education. While many of them are involved in protests, clubs, and other rallies to express their beliefs and attempt to fight inequality, many feminists out there go even further to spread the word.
By Jacqueline Hanikeh8 years ago in Viva
The 'F' Word
It is the dreaded 'F' word; the title people scared their sons, and daughters, and wives, and husbands, and friends into staying away from. It seems to be more socially acceptable in this world to tell someone to "F**k Off" rather than someone "I am a Feminist."
By Bethany Hutson8 years ago in Viva
How to Be a Lazy Feminist
I would like to start this off by saying that I use the words feminine, female, and woman as ways to express these abstract life areas that are more nurturing and “earthy” by nature, and in no way do I intend to place people in boxes or claim to have any kind of superior knowledge of anyone else’s process of what or who they identify with. I use these terms not to be gender specific or to classify people—instead I use them because, at this point in time, I have no other way to explain the concepts I am about to talk about without turning this into a thousand page essay. I am open to ideas and suggestions on how to approach these subjects in a more enlightened way if anyone has anything they would like to contribute. I am aware of the unfairness that is associated with society putting labels on people and making them choose a specific identity. I am also aware this is shifting and I am on the path of learning more—please help me learn!
By Morgan Leigh Callison8 years ago in Viva
What Does it Mean, to Me, to Be a Feminist?
What does it mean, to me, to be a feminist? I brought my cat to the vet this week because she’s taken to peeing in the house. Worse than that, it was clear that there was blood in her urine. She wasn’t just peeing in the house to be a little snit. She was telling me that she wasn’t well and she was asking for help the only way she knew how.
By Katey Myers8 years ago in Viva
My Empowerment Kick
Something has been on my mind for a few days now. I don’t know how to articulate it, but this is me attempting to. I have been single for some time now, and while I consider myself to be a “relationship person,” I think I am finally starting to get a full grasp on myself and what I believe.
By Quinn Chapman8 years ago in Viva
#MeToo Is About You, Too
There were times in the past that I was sympathetic to the cries of “Not All Men,” but after a while I’d seen and heard enough to feel like it actually was All Men. It wasn’t in overt harassment, or openly sexist comments, but the accumulation of so many little things, the “microaggressions.” But after a while of putting up with the stereotypes, assumptions, and being treated as “less than,” they started to feel a lot like the regular old macroaggressions. It was everywhere. And worse, when confronted with information that suggested they—gasp!—might be in the wrong, the Not All Men were deeply offended and incredulous that we could possibly have interpreted their innocent behaviour as sexism. Just like the person who thinks it’s worse to be accused of racism that it is to actually be racist, we end up in a never-ending cycle of complaining and then having to deal with the tantrums and denial caused by the complaint. Well #MeToo has given us the opportunity to say “No More.”
By Katy Preen8 years ago in Viva
Why Being a Man Is Not an Excuse Anymore
I recently read Andrew Sullivan’s article for NY Mag entitled, “#MeToo and the Taboo Topic of Nature” and I have to say, I’m more than a little pissed. I found this article after reading an incredible piece by Lili Loofbourow reacting to this inane “men will be men because it’s in their nature to be aggressive” column coming from Sullivan.
By Lizzie Kreitman8 years ago in Viva
Dr. Frances-White: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Feminists
The final removal of the gold painted veneer from the rusted, pervert behemoth of Hollywood is a good thing for everyone. However, the path forward is not all crystal-clear waters and plain sailing.
By Matt Richards8 years ago in Viva
